I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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