pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
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