Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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