Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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