does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
