At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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