Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
