I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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