Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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