he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize