After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
