? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
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