well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize