weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize