In the future we'll all be gay
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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