Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
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