He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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