We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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