Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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