Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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