We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize