i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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