Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
