So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
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