Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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