Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
