I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
