I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Randomize
