whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
