I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
