I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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