We won't sleep together?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
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