he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
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