zippers are such a cool invention
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
