It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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