Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize