i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
