he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
So vagazzling was a success
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
