if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Randomize