people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize