Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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