Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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