me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
