drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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