scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
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