I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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