even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Rumble strips road head = magical
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
