I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
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