I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
