Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
