i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize